Written by Jon

You are new to me

Your smell is unfamiliar

I haven’t experienced you before

Only heard of you off in the distance

You came after she left

You are unwanted

But I can’t shake you

you are as much of me as I am of you

You won’t leave

You the unwanted guest

The pounder of souls

The surpressor of breath

Dark clouds wont even follow you

You are enough by yourself

Try to run from you

Only to find you everywhere

You’re excessive

Your weight pulls me beyond under

Feeling I never will resurface

That I’ll never breathe again

I have no choice but to sit with you

And you with me

You have mixed with me

There is no pulling us apart

No distinguishing you from me

Since you won’t leave

Since I can’t tear you away from me

Since I don’t know where you end and I start

Then I will surround you - instead of you me

I will stop pushing you away

I will stop trying to tear you from me

I will accept

I will accept that we are one

We will walk

We will walk together you and I

I will no longer try to evade you

I will make room for you

I will ask you questions

I will seek your truth

The reason that you came to me

Your purpose in my life

I Will face you

I will lean in

Way in

To see what you have to offer

I see you don’t mean me harm

That there’s no other place for you to be

Than right next to me

I see you now

Youre here to help

With no words or explanation

No reason - no answers as to why

But to merely surround me

To embrace - not harm

You - as natural as my love for her

Your existence makes sense

It’s the next step

You are the new normal for loss

The comfort to the banging in my head

You are misunderstood

Your intentions have been misconstrued

You have a bad name

You have been mis shappen

But I see you

I really see you

For who you are

Who you truly are

You are GRIEF

You are my comforter

my guide

You are the one that tells me it’s ok

It’s ok to miss her

It’s ok too long for her

Matter of fact you insist

You push me toward the pain

You provide the space for the lack of words

You make room for the confusion

You make a gap for the pain

You give permission for the River of tears

You are not here to hold me back

You are here to give breath again

the go between inconceivable and reality

Between the ultimate pain and a moment of peace

I see you now

I welcome you

I make room for you

Sit next to me

Be my go between

Be my sense to nonsense

Be the hand I hold

As you guide me from here to there

You are as much of me as I am of you

You are now a welcomed guest

You are still the pounder of souls

But the provider of breath

Sit with me grief

And teach me